Friday, September 17, 2010

Ear wax/heart wax

I am finding over the past few months that I am reading more lips, leaning in more to diffuse background noise, and the word "what" comes out of my mouth quite a bit.  It's hard enough to decide to fully listen but to get out of the doorway and enter in to conversation only to say "eh?" half the time is frustrating.  With all the many voices in my own house let alone the ones in my head, it takes me more energy than I have sometimes to completely listen to the thoughts of another.

It got me thinking again this morning about reception.  A few years ago I felt prodded to meditate on what it means to receive.  For a while "moments" were taken as such.  "In the moment" graced me at times when I was with someone or out in the fray of work, errands, play, writing, etc.  But over time these moments were nibbled away by worry and stress and just plain busyness.  This is a heart issue.  Just like when I don't give my wife my full attention on a regular basis a distance grows between us, a heart can be neglected to the point of waxy build up.  It's a separation of heart and it's engagement with the life it finds itself in. 

The bible tells us to guard our heart with all diligence.  D.H.T.'s song beckons us to listen to our heart.
I really don't want to be just another "talking head".  I want to be able to receive you and life as it comes.  It really is a grace to live in the moments.  Aren't they all we have when we boil things down?
Even God said that His name is I am that I am.  Not I was.  Not I am going to be.  If I am created in God's image my essence is to be.  It is in that vein that I am able to receive the beautiful grace of life as it is and you as you is.

God, give us the grace to be still and know who You are so we can be who we are.

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